Health & Well-being Group Talk: Listening and Moving Forward - Group Talk - Week Commencing 28th September 2026

Listening, Learning and Moving Forward Together

I wanted to use today’s talk a little differently.

 Rather than me standing here and talking at you for 20 minutes, I’d like us to spend some time talking with each other — because I’ve been given some feedback recently, and I think it’s important that I listen to it properly.

 I’ve been made aware that some members feel that I can be quite loud, and that at times I may shout rather than simply speak. I’ve also been told that I talk about my family quite a lot during our sessions.

 I’ll be honest — hearing that feedback initially made me stop and think.

 When you’re doing something that you care about, it can be difficult to hear that something you’re doing might be affecting other people differently from how you intended.

 My intention has never been to make anyone uncomfortable, to dominate the group, or to make our sessions all about me or my family.

 But I also recognise something very important:

 Our intentions and the impact we have on other people can sometimes be different.

 I might not realise that I’m speaking too loudly. I might feel that I’m simply being enthusiastic, while someone else experiences it as shouting.

 I might mention my family because I’m trying to make a subject relatable or share something personal, while somebody else might feel that there is too much focus on my personal life.

 And that's why I want to talk about it openly.

 This group belongs to all of us

 One of the things I really want to emphasise is that this isn't my group.

 Yes, I may lead the talks, facilitate the sessions or stand at the front, but the group is made up of all of you.

 That means your experience matters.

 If you come here each week, you should feel comfortable enough to listen, participate, ask questions, disagree respectfully, or simply sit and take things in.

 Health and well-being is about feeling safe, supported and respected — and that applies to the way we communicate with one another as well.

 So if something about the way I run the group isn't working for you, I would genuinely like to know.

 I may not always get everything right.

 None of us do.

 But if I know something isn't working, I have the opportunity to do something about it.

 About the volume of my voice

 Let's start with the issue of my voice.

 I know I can be loud.

 I'm an enthusiastic person, and when I'm interested in something, that enthusiasm can come across in my voice.

 But enthusiasm shouldn't mean that other people feel shouted at.

 So I'd like to be more conscious of my volume.

 If I'm getting too loud, I'd actually appreciate a gentle reminder.

 You don't have to feel awkward about telling me.

 Something as simple as:

 "Could you lower your voice a little, please?"

 is absolutely fine.

 I'd rather someone tell me than sit there feeling uncomfortable.

 And I also want to make clear that if I've spoken too loudly or sounded like I was shouting, I don't want anyone to take that as me being angry with them.

 That isn't what I want to communicate.

 Tone and volume can sometimes send a message that we didn't intend.

 So that's something I'm going to work on.

Talking about my family

 The other feedback was about how much I talk about my family.

 I think there's an important reason why I do it.

 When we're talking about health, relationships, emotions, everyday challenges or life experiences, I sometimes use examples from my own life because they're real to me.

 Personal examples can make a subject feel less like a lecture and more like a conversation between people.

 But I can also understand that there needs to be a balance.

 This is a group for everyone's experiences — not just mine.

 So I'm going to be more mindful about how often I bring my family into our conversations.

 And perhaps there's a useful question for all of us here:

 How much personal sharing is helpful, and when does it become too much?

 I'd really like to hear your thoughts on that.

 Because sharing experiences can help us connect.

 But we also need boundaries.

 Not everyone wants to hear personal stories every week, and that's perfectly reasonable.

What do you want from these talks?

 This brings me to the bigger question.

 What would you actually like these weekly talks to look like?

 Because I don't want to simply stand here every week and decide what I think you need.

 I'd like us to have some ownership of the sessions.

 Maybe you want more discussion.

 Maybe you want less talking from me and more opportunity for you to talk.

 Maybe you'd like practical activities.

 Maybe you'd like us to explore particular subjects around mental health, physical health, relationships, confidence, stress, loneliness, self-care or communication.

 Maybe you'd prefer short talks followed by group discussion.

 Or perhaps you'd like occasional sessions where we simply have a cup of tea and talk about how everyone's doing.

 There isn't necessarily one right answer.

 Different people will want different things.

 And that's okay.

 Feedback isn't criticism of a person

 I also want to say something about feedback generally.

 Giving feedback can feel uncomfortable.

 Receiving feedback can feel uncomfortable too.

 But feedback doesn't have to mean:

 "You're doing everything wrong."

 It can simply mean:

 "Here's how this is affecting me."

 And that's useful information.

 I'd like us to create an environment where we can say things like:

 "I really enjoy this part of the sessions, but I'd like more of this."

 Or:

 "Sometimes I find it difficult when the room gets very loud."

 Or:

 "I'd like more time to speak."

 Or:

 "I don't really enjoy personal stories; I'd rather focus on the topic."

 Those things can be said respectfully.

 And they can be heard respectfully.

 That's the kind of group I would like us to have.

What can we change together?

 So, I'd like us to think about a few things.

 Firstly:

 What do you enjoy about our weekly sessions?

 What should we keep?

 Secondly:

 What would you change?

 Is there anything about the format, the length, the subjects or the way we communicate that you'd like to be different?

 Thirdly:

 What subjects would you like us to talk about?

 Perhaps there are things you've always wanted to discuss but haven't felt able to suggest.

 And finally:

 What would make these sessions more useful or enjoyable for you?

 I'd really like honest answers.

 And I promise that you don't have to tell me what you think I want to hear.

 If you think something could be better, tell me.

 If you think something is working really well, tell me that too.

One important thing

 I don't want today's conversation to become a situation where everyone feels they have to criticise me.

 That's not what this is about.

 I also don't want to become overly self-conscious and start worrying about every word I say.

 I'm still going to be me.

 I'm still going to be enthusiastic.

 I'm still going to care about the subjects we're discussing.

 But I can make adjustments.

 I can listen more carefully.

 I can be more aware of my volume.

 I can be more thoughtful about how much personal information I share.

 And I can make more space for everyone else.

 Because ultimately, that's what a group is about.

 It's not about one person having all the answers.

 It's about creating a space where everyone can contribute.

Moving forward

 So, going forward, I'd like to suggest that we try something slightly different.

 I'll aim to keep my own contributions focused and relevant.

 I'll be more conscious of my volume.

 I'll try not to bring my family into conversations unless there's a clear reason why it relates to the topic.

 And I'd like to build more opportunities for everyone else to contribute.

 But I don't want to make all of those decisions myself.

 I'd like you to help shape what happens next.

 Perhaps we could agree on a few simple principles together.

 For example:

 - Everyone gets an opportunity to speak.

- We listen without interrupting.

- We respect different opinions and experiences.

- Nobody is pressured to share anything personal.

- We can give feedback respectfully.

- We can say when something isn't working.

- We celebrate what is working as well as discussing what could improve.

 Those principles aren't about me.

 They're about all of us.

Let's talk

 So, I want to finish by saying thank you.

 Thank you to the people who have given me feedback.

 It isn't always easy to say these things, and it isn't always easy to hear them.

 But I'd much rather have an honest conversation than have people quietly become uncomfortable and stop enjoying coming to the group.

 I care about these sessions.

 I care about the people who come along.

 And I want the group to be somewhere that people look forward to coming to.

 So I'm going to hand things over to you.

 I'd like to hear from you.

 What do you enjoy about our weekly talks?

 What would you like to change?

 Are there things I could do differently?

 What subjects would you like us to cover?

 Would you like more discussion, activities, or practical exercises?

 And importantly:

 What would make you feel that these sessions are genuinely useful for your health and well-being?

 You can be honest with me.

 You won't offend me by giving constructive feedback.

 I may not be able to change everything, and I may sometimes have a different view, but I will listen.

 Because this isn't about getting everything perfect.

 It's about being willing to learn, being willing to listen, and being willing to make things better.

 And perhaps that's actually a good health and well-being lesson for all of us.

 We don't have to be perfect.

 We just have to be open to learning.

 Thank you for listening.

 Now I'd really like to hear from you.

 Resource: ChatGPT